Longcat: He Who Came First

Today er, tonight we shall discuss the undisputed lords and masters of the internet (although, this BEING the internet, some would argue otherwise): Lolcats.

Well, actually, we’re talking about the cats that came before our dark lords.

Unthinkable though it may be, once there were no Lolcats. But one day it came, shining like the sun: Longcat.

As you can see, Longcat is, well, long. Hence the name. He’s not a TRUE Lolcat, note the lack of caption in impact font, but he is the sire of cats to come.

This first picture would spark a phenomenon; soon new pictures of Longcat were popping up all about the net. It’s true- cats go with the internet like chocolate and peanut butter, demons and brimstone, even Garfield and no humor.

But it could not last forever- soon, as they always do, a challenger would appear: Tacgnol.

Tacgnol is the inverse of Longcat in ever way. Longcat is white, Tacgnol is black. Longcat stands for good and justice, Tacgnol stands for evil and travesty. Longcat is long, Tacgnol is gnol.

Soon an epic battle would be raged.

But, before that, other, third parties would appear showing their disdain for the powers of the two, such as Widedog, a dog who is exceedingly wide.

Suffice to say, these never caught on.

And then the epic battle raged as only it could on the internet: through awesomely photoshopped images.

But, unfortunately I’m strapped for time and I can’t show you any pictures…

Wazzat? You WISH for me to waste my time and show you the pics? Well, the customer is always right (despite the fact that this thing has yet to, and is unlikely to, ever yield me so much as a dime)!

Ya, ya, ya. It’s a small picture. If you’re so upset, look for one yourselves. Go on. I dare ya.

And that wraps it up for Longcat, if you want more Google is your friend.

Garfieldless

Got what this post is about yet? If not, I got a clue for you: look up. There, got it now?

As you can see, unless you are blind in which case I politely ask how you are viewing this at all, this is the popular, if not particularly funny, comic Garfield without the titular character, Garfield.

Instead, through the magic of photoshop, the lonely adventures of the social pariah John Arbuckle are revealed. It shows us the emptiness of life, challenges us to revel in what little we have, and, as an added bonus, is vastly funnier than the original comic is.

This is a fine example of internet humor- new media interacting and changing pre-existing media to either A. customize it to the users tastes or B. make it the users own art. Indeed, without Photoshop, such a feat would hardly be possible.

This is all I’m willing to show you- if you want more, Google is your friend.

Opening Statements

Testing… testing… is this thing on? Well, first and foremost this blog was created for a class I’m taking so, if you like it, don’t get TOO attached to it- The Prancing Walrus Periodical may bid adieau.

About the name? Well, I like Walruses and I like Homestarrunner. Who prances. There you have it.